1. Easy Way. 2. Hard Way. 3. My Way

Many people build a treehouse by finding a tree of substantial girth and nailing random pieces of wood (or not-so-random, as the treehouse biz has gone all high-end) into it. I’ve taken a different tack: I built a very substantial tower (known around these parts as The Crow’s Nest) several years ago, and am allowing maple seedlings to grow underneath it and carry it up to the sky. My children’s grandchildren will have a seriously cool treehouse, I can assure you.

Some level of order has been restored to the yard, including the yanking of aforementioned seedlings, which were growing unimpeded since we surrendered the idea of keeping the sandbox free of cat poop. Raked up half a billion maple seeds, too. The party tomorrow has a camping theme, so we will be pitching tents in the morning. Bekah is seriously overloaded with the enormity of her birthday, and cries about every three seconds. All is going according to plan.

Lance, you’re killing me, man. . . . Listen, the leaders of the race are NOT supposed to competing for sprint bonuses, anyway. What is going on here?