Best Rock ‘n’ Roll Movie Ever

“School of Rock” totally rocked. Believe me, I didn’t expect to be saying that anyone, including me, would be able to bear 2 hours of Jack Black on the wide screen. But there wasn’t a moment when he wasn’t perfect, and there wasn’t a moment that was dull, or gratuitous, or not good. The movie just rocked beginning to end. Plus, of course, Joan Cusack, which I believe we discussed earlier. And Sarah Silverman, which we didn’t, but she was excellent. My girls loved it; Bekah was dancing in her seat. And sometimes not in her seat.

So, okay, maybe best rock ‘n’ roll movie ever is ambitious, but it’s definitely in the Top 5. It’s right up there with “The Commitments” (technically an R&B movie, but still), “Quadrophenia” (a true rock ‘n’ roll movie, with music as background to the story), “Rock ‘n’ Roll High School” and the incomparable “A Hard Day’s Night.”

I will admit that I once thought that “Streets of Fire” was a great rock movie, but I was mistaken, blinded by a serious ache for Diane Lane and a willingness to forgive its reliance on a completely suck song by Dan Hartman. However, it introduced me to The Blasters, and it’s still a dumb fun sort of urban fantasy. This is not to be confused with one of Diane Lane’s other forays into rock moviedom, “Ladies and Gentlemen, the Fabulous Stains.” I remember only two things about this one: despite being played on cable about every five minutes in the mid-’80s, it was virtually unwatchable, and Diane Lane spits out “We’re the Fabulous Stains, and we don’t put out!” to try to show us she’s punk. She’s not. Diane Lane? She’s a lot of things, but not punk.

Enough! There’s work to be done!