Night of the Living Turkeys
Let me just say this: if you are riding your bike through vast, lonely, empty cemetery (as I am wont to do), and the sound of your changing gears suddenly frightens a previously unseen flock of turkeys into vocalizing their distress, there’s a good chance you will no longer need to look around for a place to pee.
That is all.
My Dear Mr. Johnson,Your encounter with those fowl which one of our founding fathers, Benjamin Franklin, perceived only the noblest of attributes in, leads me to wonder just what it is about turkeys that the mere notice of their presence instigates urinary distress.Let me assure you, Mr. Johnson, that the turkeys one encounters in upstate NY bone yards are hardly a match for their counterparts to be found roaming the streets of Southern NH. Indeed, these turkeys, which travel in packs, are not unknown to savage pedestrians and bring down those on bikes with fine wire strung across the road.I beg that you stop sharing with readers what prompts you to bladder evacuation. In like consideration, I would also recommend that you avoid watching this evening’s GOP presidential debate.There have never been more ‘turkeys’ loose in the streets of NH!
Surely, that can’t be THE KSartoris?