Side effects include what, now?!

I think I’m something of an anomaly in our modern world and maybe I’m not doing my part for the economy, but I’m one of the least medicated people around. I gave up on the whole hair concept, my arousal needs no pharmaceutical incentives, and my blood pressure is still so low I get dizzy when I stand up. So, other than a daily allergy spray, I’m free to scoff at the nightly barrage of prescription pharmaceutical ads. But I do have what they used to call the crazy legs, only now it’s called “restless legs syndrome.” And now there’s a medicine for it. And even then, I’ve probably heard ads for it a hundred times without really listening, until last night I was half-listening and suddenly one of the dire warnings of side effects filtered through — “may include compulsive gambling.” I had to roll the DVR back to be sure that was really what they had said. Listen, I expect that when I have to resort to pharmaceuticals, I may experience a little drowsiness, a little shortness of breath, a little lightheadedness — NOT the sudden onset of an addiction I previously didn’t have.