Two desires

I’m going away for a couple of days to a place much warmer and significantly sunnier (and yet where I could, if I could take the time, easily make an amazing ski trip). When I get back, I want two things:

1. All you New Year’s Resolution people, if you could please stop clogging up the gym. I love you, I wish you the best, I have been in your barely broken-in sneakers. But you’re not going to stick with it and right now you’re making things impossible for those of us who use the place year round. So, unless you’re really dedicated and this is the time you’re going to turn things around (and if so, good for you!), please be gone when I get back. I need an f’ing swim lane and more than 3 square feet of the track.

2. All you kids, please stop hoovering my site for the History of Crown Point. I know you’re just copying the whole thing and turning it in. Or if you’re gonna do that, at least send me a present from my Amazon wish list. Why, in my day, we had to bum rides to the library and feed dimes into the copiers in order to plagiarize a good paper! Damn whippersnappers . . . .