Neighborly love

We have a neighbor who is out and about pretty much all day, walking his dog. It’s the most well-walked dog around. I’ve heard the guy’s wife, and I think I have a good idea about why he needs to walk the dog so much. And he’s a nice enough guy, we wave and say hi and if I’m out in the driveway when he comes by we talk.

So tonight I’m upstairs by the window and I hear someone muttering, but a loud kind of mutter, and I look out the window and there’s this guy with his dog, muttering like a crazy person: “Asshole! He’s such an asshole! He is such an asshole!” over and over and over.

Well, whatever. He moves on. And then my paranoid self gets to wondering — after all, he’s outside my house. Am I the asshole? I can’t imagine why I would be. But someone is. I don’t think it’s me. But is it me?

I hope I’m not the asshole!